This week, I joined the 100,000 people who have become Labour members recently in time to elect a new party leader. Jeremy Corbyn’s disastrous defeat in December showed the party needs a completely new direction – and a leader who has a chance of winning a general election.
Right now, we need someone who the whole country is likely to regard as reliable, trustworthy and a safe pair of hands. Labour needs to focus all its energy on winning over the nation: no more populists or politicians with personalities so big they divide groups of friends.
Corbyn polarised party members, but now he’s stepping aside it is our chance to elect someone who can finally give the Tories a run for their money. And although my heart says that person is the feisty, intelligent, Brummie MP Jess Phillips, my head says I should abandon my feminist principles on this one and vote for yet another man - Keir Starmer.
If I do vote for Starmer, I can’t help but feel I’m letting the side down; it’s high time Labour had its first female leader. But as Nancy Pelosi, the speaker of the House of Representatives in the US, said ‘I don’t think that any woman should be asked to vote for someone because she’s a woman.’
So then why can’t I bring myself to vote for her? The reason is that, if she became party leader and stood against the Tories in an election, I don’t trust the country to vote Labour in.
I, however, wouldn’t be voting for Phillips just because she’s female. I agree with her politics, my world view aligns with hers, she speaks a lot of sense and has a personality that cuts through the noise. She’d do a great job of holding Boris Johnson to account and it’s likely she’d better represent women’s interests in Parliament than a man. The fact that she’d be the first female leader of the Labour party would be an enormous – and overdue – bonus, too.
So then why can’t I bring myself to vote for her? The reason is that, if she became party leader and stood against the Tories in an election, I don’t trust the country to vote Labour in. After ten years of austerity under Tory rule the stakes are too high to take a chance on another risky – albeit potentially brilliant, in her case – Labour leader.
Can the country handle an outspoken, funny, spirited woman who is from a working-class background in Birmingham? I’m painfully aware misogyny and classism are at play here. Margaret Thatcher and Theresa May show we’ve had female leaders in the past, but they were traditional and middle-class enough to satisfy a certain type of man.
Although most men in this country are, hopefully, on board with the idea that women are key to public life and can of course be successful leaders, a small, sad minority still find the thought intolerable. Because of them, Labour could miss out again.
As a feminist, I feel an enormous amount of guilt for not voting for a woman who I know is fully capable. I’m all for Labour’s all-women shortlists and the fact they have increased the proportion of female MPs. Equally, I’d be delighted if Phillips were to be prime minister. The problem is I'm worried that she never would be.
There’s still time to listen to all the candidates’ arguments and I’m going to keep an open mind, but out of Rebecca Long-Bailey, Lisa Nandy, Emily Thornberry, Phillips and Starmer, the latter two candidates seem to be the strongest by far.
So right now, until our country sorts out its ingrained sexism problem, we need to go with the candidate who can win. Let’s hope soon gender won’t feature in this debate at all and an outspoken woman can unite the country if she’s the best candidate for the job.
READ MORE: EXCLUSIVE: Jeremy Corbyn: There’ll Probably Be An Election Next Year And We’ll Probably Win