You do a lot of growing up in the years after you leave home. And while you might be worried about telltale wrinkles or your first grey hair, the most noticeable ageing happens not on your body but in your flat. Like a tree trunk cut across the middle, it’s easy to tell how old someone is by the state of their living space and the contents of their fridge. Here’s the rundown:
19 years old – Student wreck
Your wardrobe is your bedroom floor, your kitchen cupboard is harbouring new life forms and your smartest outfit is a T-shirt with a picture of a blazer on it. There is a drawer full of condoms that never gets emptied.
20 years old – Getting it together
You’ve learned it’s unacceptable to wear pyjamas to the supermarket. You wash your sheets twice a month, even if you haven’t had sex. You’re getting your five a day (if you count the tomato sauce on pizza and Fruit Pastilles).
21 years old – First flat
You’ve started decanting tea bags and coffee into jars. There is at least one bit of non-mould-based vegetation in your home. Once a month you cook something other than pasta or ready meals.
22 years old – Earning some money
You’re learning that there are other places to order pizza other than Dominos, and other places to buy underwear than Primark. You hoover, not just in the vague area of the carpet, but under things and round the back of stuff. You have learned over four types of wine (you do not have a preference, as they still all taste the same).
23 years old – Pretend grown-up
There are two different kinds of butter in your fridge – one for cooking, one for spreading. You have a “system” for organising your shoes and you separate your washing into whites and colours. You have at least one pot and lid that matches. You own a rug and you’re considering investing in a slip.
24 years old – Ideas above your station
You get a herb garden for your windowsill and the plants all die. You attempt to iron your trousers and burn a hole in them. You try to put on a fancy dinner party, but everyone ends up eating at 12.30am. You attempt to clean your shoes each week and ruin six toothbrushes in the process. You fill jars up with couscous, bulgar wheat and red lentils. They never get used.
25 years old – Acceptance
Your room is tidy and your kitchen is well stocked, but you’ve settled for only cooking from scratch twice a week. Shoes get dirty and you’ve dealt with that too. You’ve called bullshit on a few things, too: dried and fresh oregano taste the same in a bolognese, there’s no point in getting nine quilts and twenty pillows for your bed when you just have to chuck them off every night, and all soap is basically the same.
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.