In case you hadn't realised yet, watching Eurovision is pretty much – to quote noughties pop punk band Fallout Boy - the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off. If you’ve always dismissed the competition as unbearably camp then you’re not far wrong. It’s awful, it’s terrible, it’s British bashing in the extreme but it’s also a whole lot of fun. We promise. Here’s how to have a spectacular Eurovision party that’ll give you a new found respect for that music you normally only hear on holiday in those clubs that reside on the area of town known as 'The Strip'. Maximum fun guaranteed, that’s The Debrief promise. If not, we’ll come round your house and sing My Lovely Horse for you.
The Drink
Who’d have thunk it. Ireland are actually the most successful country in the history of Eurovision, walking away with a whopping seven number one wins. Although why Jedward only placed a measly 8th and 19th in the two years that they represented their homeland we’ll never know. #Youwererobbed.
To celebrate our neighbours’ excellent record (and commiserate the fact that they didn't even make it into the finals this year) make your drink of choice a frozen Irish coffee. Not only does it taste rather excellent, it’ll keep you awake during the unfeasibly long section of the broadcast that sees every country read out their phone votes. Check out this recipe from blog The Sweetest Occasion.
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Ingredients
2 cups cold-brew coffee
1 cup Irish whiskey
1 can of cola
1/2 cup heavy cream
Method
Pour all ingredients into a pitcher and stir to combine. Coffee, cola, and whiskey can be combined up to 2 hours ahead and chilled. Add cream right before serving.
The Food
Really, the snacking part of the night works best if you get each person to bring a dish from a different country. But, as proved over 1000 times before, people are shit and are definitely going to show up empty handed. Last year at our party three separate people arrived with a box of soggy chips from the chicken shop claiming they were representing Great Britain with the ‘chips’ part of ‘fish and chips’. We really question some peoples’ commitment to Sparkle Motion. So, as a back-up here’s some simple bits to do that are easy to make and don’t involve you spending a fortune.
Garlic Bread
Yep it’s a total cop out but it’s cheap and easy to make, definitely counts as representing Italy and will fill people up so they don’t go raiding your flatmates cupboards and eating her bagels again. We’re big fans of this recipe.
Ingredients
4 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened
2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
2 tablespoons finely chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley
2 teaspoons finely chopped garlic
1 (15- by 3 1/2-inch) loaf Italian bread
1/4 cup grated Parmesan cheese
Instructions
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Preheat oven to 350°F.
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Stir together the butter, oil, garlic and parsley in a small bowl.
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Using a serrated knife cut the bread into 1-inch-thick slices without cutting all the way through to the bottom, leave the slices attached to each other.
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Gently pull apart the slices and use a pastry brush to butter them with the garlic mixture, then sprinkle with Parmesan (you don't have to use it all).
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Wrap the loaf in foil and bake in the center of the oven for 15 minutes. After 15 minutes open up the foil and bake 5 minutes more.
If your guests are still moaning about being hungry and you’re only halfway through the live performances get some pizza dough (carbs prevent your house being trashed, always remember that) and get your guests to make a pizza or pide to represent the country they’re supporting. For instance meatballs? Sweden. Sausage? German. Horse? France. Job’s a good’un.
The Game
Support Stonewall and have a whale of a time with their Eurovision Bingo – just collect a quid from each person, print out their bingo cards and off you go. First one to complete it wins erm, Eurovision. Or something, we haven’t really figured this whole thing out yet. Either way, you’ll probably place higher than Great Britain. Nil points all round.
Follow Jess on Twitter @jess_commons
This article originally appeared on The Debrief.