Sad news for anyone who’s basically pretty well off but loves to have a discount-pretend at being really wealthy: there’s going to be a Prosecco shortage this summer!
At least that’s what a leading producer says.
‘Last year’s harvest was very poor, and down by up to 50% in some parts, so there’s a very real possibility of a global shortage,’ Roberto Cremonese told the drinks business at the London Wine Fair.
‘We’ll find out how big the problem is in August when the brokers release their stock. At the moment we don’t know how much Prosecco they’re holding on to.’
Distributors have the Prosecco power, and there are two possible outcomes. Either they’ll put up the price of the now-rarer-than-before bottles (wait a second, Prosecco as expensive as Champagne? That kind of defies the point...). Or, ‘It might turn out that some of them have no fizz left but we’ll have to wait and see.’
Wow! What else can we eat or drink to feign that we’re really posh? Tyrells crisps, buffet food using a knife and fork, dark Ryvita, smoked trout instead of smoked salmon, really cheap olives from the corner shop, spiralised SPAM (anything spiralised is a bit swish, right?)? We’ll keep you posted.
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.