You’ve got The O.C.’s Have A Very Merry Chrismukkah on repeat, the tree is lit and soon your fam will be too. But if this is your first Christmas as avegan, there’s no getting around the fact that dinner on the 25th might feel like a pretty intense affair. To quote The Curious Dog In The Night Time: You’re statistically most likely to be murdered by a member of your family on Christmas Day, and showing up to your Aunt Ivy’s with the intention to make everyone feel awful about tucking into their roast dinner is certainly a good way to get that ball rolling.
Since turning vegan, I’ve been to my fair share of festive get-togethers ready for a verbal hazing, only to realise everyone’s either pretty down with it or just thinks I’ve taken another eccentric turn. So any guide on surviving Christmas as a vegan should also be tempered with ‘How Not To Be A Douche During The Holidays’. As important as it is to stand your ground, being grateful for the extra effort your family might have to make to cater for you is also vital. If you’re interested in showing how easy veganism can be to your friends and family, make it easy for them.
I don’t care how many sherries you had with Nan during the Queen’s Speech. No-one wants to remember the year their cousin went vegan and made everyone feel like crap. So stock up on some easy-to-veganise extras in tow, bring enough for everyone to sample, and you’ll hopefully wake up on Boxing Day pleasantly surprised.
To tofurkey or not tofurkey
First thing’s first; the turkey question is not going to deal with itself. If you’re spending Christmas at home, ask your family if they’d mind you making an alternative to the turkey centrepiece. It can replace it, or go alongside. Toad in the hole with vegan sausages is a great comfort food alternative, or try a nut roast, stuffed squashes, or even breaded seitan. They all go down pretty well with the rest of Christmas dinner, and to be honest, your family might have been eating the same stuff for 20-odd years, so a bit of change will be a welcome thing.
If you’re staying at a relative’s place, I’d plan to make something easier. Holland & Barrett and Ocado both have great vegan chilled sections. Look out for a tofurkey you can freeze when you get home to your parents, make a pie that just needs reheating in the oven for 10 minutes before serving, or if you’re really stuck for ideas, a few veggie sausages are the easiest way to go.
Nobody puts side dishes in a corner
Side dishes often go overlooked but I like to think of them as the understudies - they can easily steal the show by bringing a bit of surprise and flair to the meal. Once you’ve got the turkey out of the way, it’s actually really easy to turn the rest of Christmas dinner vegan. What’s more, if you’ve got the household’s head chef on-side, you can probably do this without anyone else telling the difference.
Instead of goose fat, roast potatoes can be made using vegetable shortening or olive oil, which makes them super crispy. A lot of classic onion-flavoured gravies are also vegan, like Bisto, and you can add some sliced red onions or balsamic vinegar to them to spruce them up a bit.
Vegan stuffing
Cheaper stuffing mixes are often vegan, and again, add in a handful of chopped nuts, dried fruit and herbs to transform the own-brand recipe into something entirely new. You’ll end up with a few slightly different dishes from what your family is used to, but with the extra fresh vegetables and herbs, it’ll brighten up the table and the fact that it’s also vegan will probably go unnoticed. Braised red cabbage, carrots, parsnips and greens can easily be kept vegan, and most condiments are also meat-free, as long as there’s no gelatin or honey in them. Other meat-free dishes that are perfect to bring along to Christmas dinner at a friend or relative’s house are vegan potato and celeriac dauphinoise (made with soy or oat cream), a root vegetable mash with chives (again, add in soy cream for extra richness) and homemade cranberry sauce.
Make like Cher Horowitz and bake something to impress
People’s awareness of veganism has come a long way in the last few years, so if you’ve got a relative insisting they’ll cater for your vegan diet too, offer to bake something sweet instead. Make enough for everyone to share, and it’ll be a great way to say thank you to your fam for going that extra mile. Tried and tested favourites include chocolate truffles made with coconut oil, shortbread cut into cute shapes, some extra-rich brownies to have in the evening (decorate with glitter and children will love them too), or some homemade mince pies with Jus Rol pastry, which is vegan (apart from the all-butter varieties). Spend Christmas Eve preparing a batch or two of something festive, and you can surprise everyone after lunch. Even the pickiest of eaters won’t be able to tell the difference.
Also worth noting (in case, for some godawful reason, this has passed you by) a lot of good quality chocolate, around 60% cocoa and upwards, is vegan. Jamie Oliver did a great Christmas recipe a few years back by just freezing grapes to serve with broken up pieces of chocolate, and as far as low-maintenance puddings go, I’m yet to find a better one.
Do your drinking research before you get gazeboed
Obviously it’s entirely up to how far you take your veganism. A lot of people turn a blind eye when it comes to drinking different wines or beers because it feels like too much hassle. But if you want to go really strict, read up before-hand and be aware of the general trends that seem to happen with vegan and non-vegan alcohol. Wine and prosecco are your trickiest subjects. Bring vegan wine you’ve chosen if that’s going to be an issue for you, and on the whole, pricier prosecco and champagne will most likely be vegan, but, again, check beforehand. Beer is a little easier- there are only a few major brands in the UK that aren’t vegan, and liquor is easier still- Campari recently became vegan (so just make sure you’re drinking from a bottle that’s not a few years old), and most of the vodkas and gins you can buy in the supermarket are vegan. If in doubt, Barnivore is an ace website that you can keep on a tab to search quickly to check whether a beer, wine or liquor is animal-free.
Other ways to be the favourite vegan in the building
The major things I’ve spotted from four years as the only vegan at the table are that people want to eat the same thing at Christmas. There’s definitely something about the fact you’ve probably travelled 500+ miles between you to get home. So have a chat with whoever is hosting beforehand. This might be the first time they’ve cooked meat free before, and while you might have your go-to recipes all prepared, it can feel totally overwhelming for someone new to the meat-free game. Offer to bring whatever they’re least confident in preparing, and always turn up with an emergency understudy dish as well. Pop a carton of soy milk in the fridge if you’re staying over, and bring a bottle of vegan alcohol if that’s important to you.
In years gone by I’ve had every intention to do some outlandish things with pumpkin, seitan and hazelnuts, but come 11am on Christmas day and three glasses of prosecco down, it never feels like the way you actually want to spend the next three hours, and that Peaky Blinders boxset isn’t going to watch itself.
A packet of Linda McCartney sausages or a vegan pie you treated yourself to in Whole Foods will mean even if your Dad gets the whole thing wrong, no-one has to know, and you can all spend the 25th December on talking terms, and hopefully having an ace time, regardless of your differences in diet. After all, there’s defo a time to question where the food on our plates comes from, but peace on earth and all that too, right?
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.