Al right so it’s not quite winter just yet, but we’ll be darned if we’re heading out to the nearest beer garden wearing our shortest shorts any more this year. Staying in just got acceptable again and it is with a weary heart that we take a look round our poky flat and realise that we’ve kind of erm, neglected the place. Going out every night for three months will do that you see.
Now, seeing as X Factor’s started and Downton’s on its way, it’s time to turn your living room into a hibernation station. Here’s a few things to buy to help you do that.
This magic cling film that’ll fix rubbish windows
Not the sexiest of purchases, but if you’ve got shitty old Victorian windows that might as well not be there for the severity of draught you normally get down the back of your neck while watching TV, this stuff is the next best thing to double glazing. Just stick it on, blast it with your hairdryer and wait for it to become smooth and taut. Good luck getting through that, Mr Wind.
£11.72 – eBay
These tealights that won’t burn your house down
If the thought of leaving your inept housemates up with burning candles fills you with the fear of God, bin the lot of them (candles, not housemates) and replace them with these super-cheap electric versions which will a) last longer and b) not burn your house to the ground, while c) still creating the cosiest room this side of wherever log cabins are found.
£2, Tiger
This super-cheap rug means it won’t matter that you don’t own slippers
Know what’s cold? Wood floors. Although TBH in the battle of wood v carpet we’re always going to go with wood because plum tomato and mascarpone soup (wanker) is ultimately a lot easier to clean up when dropped. But, this snazzy rug might be just the ticket to stop your stockinged feet getting a chill. We’re old now so we can say stuff like ‘getting a chill’. Bugger off.
£18, Urban Outfitters
This incense will get rid of the smell of summer house parties
Sure, it’s hot, come over to my house and smoke and drink your way around it, she said, not realising that come September when the windows finally close, maybe 100 people smoking inside wasn’t such a good idea. Febreze the hell out of your sofas, but also get your hands on these posh apple pie incense sticks to cancel out any stale eau de Golden Virginia you’ve still got hanging around.
£8, Goodhood
Picture: Anna Sudit
This article originally appeared on The Debrief.