We Tried On All The Clothes We Desperately Want From Zara RN

Seeing the massive patterned jumper, leopard print skirt and pointed thigh highs laid out next to each other was slightly intimidating at first - it kind of looked as though they'd been paired by accident in some sort of shopping bag collision. But once on, the skirt was a lot less scary than the Mel B print would suggest, even with the big ol' jumper on top. Quite cute and Gemma Cairney-ish. A lewk. Zara, Round Neck Jacquard Sweater , £29.99; Zara, Animal Print Midi Skirt, £29.99; Zara, Leather High Heeled Boots, £169

I am pretty much up for anything as long as I gt to wear pyjamas, so was looking forward to putting this on. As much as I liked this in theory, it was quite low cut meaning I had to wear this superfluous albeit pretty pink polo underneath in order to make sure I didn't take someone's eye out. As for the shoes, they certainly took the party from the bedroom to the streets.Zara, Velvet Jumpsuit, £15.99

Like the jumpsuit, this jacket was marred by fashion's current vendetta against anyone above a C cup (stop making everything backless, strapless and down to the navel! We cannot all go braless!). I did manage to shoehorn myself into it, but it looks far more striking when done up to the top which simply wasn't possible for me. So, dear D-cup friends size up. Same for the sheer shirt below - gorgeous but a bit too booby for even me. The trousers fit like a glove though!Zara, Checked Blazer With Back Buckle, £39.99; Zara, Tulle Top, £5.99

Absolutely loved the whole 'lady in red' thing going on here. The boots were bliss in shoe form - perfect heel height, chunky and comfortable. Loved the polo neck, which was fitted but not tight, and the leggings that made me look semi #thicc which was a pleasant side effect.Zara, Cropped Jacquard Trousers, £15.99

As you can probably already tell, I'm a bit of a sucker for oversized jumpers (I leave the house in those massive men's tees and joggers whenever feasibly possible) so this striped, knitted number was very much up my street. The velvet trousers were a decent length and comfy, which is a huge bonus in my book.Zara, Striped Sweater With Bow, £29.99; (Similar) Zara, Velvet Culottes, £15.99

This saucy-wood-nymph-from-a-Dutch-fable dress is very stylish. And, very short - but in a cheeky, Carry On sort of way. The sleeves are especially epic, with really lovely, detailed embroidery at the elbows. These killer boots (literally killer - I had a heartbeat in my toes after wearing them for too long) make it a lot more dressy and provide some needed leg coverage in this God-awful weather. It may be a little bit cold for this outfit, but it's a look very much inspired by the mantra of the great Tyra Banks; 'hoe but make it fashun'. And in the words of the even greater Cardi B - 'a hoe never gets cold'.Zara, Embroidered Velvet Dress, £19.99; Zara, Leather High Heeled Boots, £169