You can justify pretty much anything if you try hard enough. No, really. Everything from that extra five minutes in bed; 'Ooh but I did stay up really late last night and perhaps an extra five minutes snooze will make me more productive at work today?’ to getting off with your obnoxious ex-boyfriend who's just come back from three months in Australia where he's picked up an Aussie accent à la Richie from 5ive: 'But three months away is really quite a long time, he's almost definitely managed to stamp out that silly habit of his for cheating on his girlfriends with their best friends.' Sure.
When it comes to buying clothes though we're naturally gifted at justifying purchases. Over and over again you're pretty much conning yourself into buying things you don't need; you're basically robbing yourself blind every time you do. Which seems silly.
Here's how you do it.
‘I’ll wear it all the time’
Will you though? I did this with a skirt I bought last week and my reasoning was that I was buying a ‘staple’; a nice basic piece from a shop that makes A-OK quality stuff with the view that you’ll wear it so much that it’ll eventually pay for itself. Or something. Which of course is never the case. When was the last time you spent more than a month being enamoured with a new piece of clothing? Pah, that skirt’s got two months tops before you buy your next ‘staple’ you fickle little lady.
‘It’s in the sale’
Because no-one wanted it. Because you didn’t want it. Just because it’s cheaper now does not mean that that belt looks any less plasticky or that section around your midriff a bit looser than it was when you tried it on two months ago. Step back from the sales, then stop, drop and roll yourself up into a little ball, foetus style, protecting your wallet from any other temptations.
‘I need a new [insert item here]'
With the exception of a swimsuit, two days before you go on a holiday that is set to involve sitting by the pool and not a lot else, then you probably don’t ‘need’ anything. Unless the alternative to you buying said item is you walking down the high street naked as the day you were born with nothing but a flannel to cover your modesty, you definitely don’t ‘need’ it.
‘I’ve got an event I need an outfit for’
Because you’re not Kate Middleton (and you can thank your lucky stars for that one) literally not one person gives a tiny rat's arse if you wear the same outfit twice. Unless that person is your boss and you’re three hours late to work wearing the same thing you had on yesterday. But, considering no-one’s going to remember what you wore to Aunty Sue’s wedding last year, ain’t no-one going realise you’re wearing it again to her next wedding this year. The main topic of conversation will probably be something to do with Aunty Sue being a ‘goer’.
‘I could do with cheering myself up’
Only a thing if you’ve got something in mind you KNOW makes you look banging and has a totally reasonable price tag. Heading willy nilly to the shops with nary an idea in sight of what you’re after is definitely not a cure for happiness. Between staring at your cellulite in overly-lit dressing rooms, dropping money you don’t have on things you’re not totally sold on and dealing with hundreds of harassed women in the town centre trying to do the same thing, you’re much better off staying in bed with a bag of Doritos and an episode of Don’t Tell The Bride. Much cheaper.
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.