In Defence Of Tights Being Totally Awesome

They get a hard time, But tights truly are your best friend when it comes to fashion


by Emma Gannon |
Published on

Over the years, tights have really got a bad name for themselves, haven’t they? People instantly think a) baggy crotch b) mum’s drawer c) a rogue hole, or worse still d) footless.

But with Miley Cyrus championing tights in the new advert for Golden Lady tights we decided this needed re-examining. And it must be said, Miley looks amazing and is totally bringing back the idea that tights can be sexy. In your face, tights-haters.

It's worth mentioning there are a whole host of awesome people who also wear tights. Caitlin Moran’s signature look is tights with denim shorts and Dr Martin boots. Kate Middleton wears tights under her dresses which highlights that she's a classy Duchess (however, this article does not endorse nude tights). Alexa Chung quite frequently gets her legs out in expensive opaque tights paired with those awesome dresses she specialises in.

Read More: We Heart That Alexa Chung's First Topshop Purchase Was A Sweatshirt That She Agonised Over Whether She Could Afford

Let’s not forget that in adult life, tights can be life-savers. Especially to us mere mortals who often need to survive this big scary world of fashion, and also the British weather.

So here are the best bits about wearing tights:

Hello… You don’t have to shave your legs for a whole season** **

Maybe this is just me, but during the winter months I love that the tights go on, jumpers get thicker and more woolley, and so do your legs. Hey presto, you pull up some tights and you don’t really have to worry about anything until the sun starts shining (rather glumly) about six months later.

They can be flattering

Tights were the first Spanx, before Spanx was invented. Finding yourself a well-fitting pair of tights can give the same elusion as a £150 body-shaper. Trust us.

You can get into those shoes you love that are slightly too small** **

The lubricant of the tights material enables you to wedge your feet into those shoes that you bought in the sale in a half size too small becuase the discount was so good. Socks are out of the question and so are barefeet as they would be blister-central. But voila, whack on some super sleek tights from M&S and your feet are magically smaller.

Read More: These Free People Boots Are Pretty Much Everything To Us

They are the answer to those 'WTF weather' days

On those days when it is misleadingly 'sunny' followed by showers of rain, a pair of tights save you from looking like a seasonally-confused dick. The only other answer to confused weather is wearing jeggings. And we all know we don't want to go back there.

You can moonwalk across a kitchen floor

Being drunk on tequila and wearing tights is the best thing ever. You can slide across a kitchen floor like Tom Cruise in Risky Business does, or moonwalk like a young Michael Jackson.

There's less probability of an accidental flash** **

As someone who likes to wear very short dresses and skirts, wearing a pair of tights means that you don’t have awkward situations in which people can see the flesh of your bumcheeks when you are on an escalator. Tights act as that lifelong friend who would also cover up your dignity before a mean girl at school snapped and tagged you on Facebook. And for that they are owed a massive THANKS!

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** Follow Emma on Twitter @girllostincity**

This article originally appeared on The Debrief.

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