Shameless Objectification: Pierre Perrier

It's as if the universe has produced an identikit Fit French Bloke for us to gawp at. Thanks, universe

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by Rebecca Holman |
Published on

French men are great, aren’t they? They’re so effortlessly sexy, that accent’s amazing, and everyone knows that they’ve got excellent taste in both posh underwear and pastries. PLUS, French men never sext you (which is all a bit Lee Ryan, non?), instead they will send you a ‘textopornographie’ which is far classier. And have you ever got a French man to talk dirty to you? If not, we suggest you go out into the street and find one to whisper utter filth into your ear, STAT. Admittedly, Gerard Depardieu is looking a bit ropey these days, and Francois Hollande isn’t having a great week, but generally, French men are FIT – agreed?

He is in possession of the most French name and hair in the history of the universe

Anyway, the fittest of all the French fitties is Pierre Perrier, star of Gallic drama The Returned (haven’t watched it yet? Do. It’s smart, taut and creepy). Not only is he the most Gallic-looking bloke we’ve ever seen, he’s also packing some serious charisma, and a hot body to boot (apparently the French love a good nude scene). Also, he is in possession of the most French name and hair in the history of the universe.

Imagine all those weekends away in the South of France where he expertly orders the wine and (sexily) feeds you escargots. Imagine him (sexily) drinking an espresso in the winter while wearing the hell out of a peacoat and scarf, his hair all lovely and floppy. Imagine him (sexily) bringing you croissants in bed in the morning – the nice ones from the bakery, not the chewy, supermarket ones, and buying you those APC ankle boots for your birthday because he was passing the store in Paris one day and thought they were the sort of thing you’d like. JUST IMAGINE. Plus, you’d finally be forced to work out how the past imperfect tense actually works, which would be useful.

Vital Statistics

Age: 29

From: Val-de-Marne, France

Significant other? Apparently, he’s going out with the ridiculously beautiful Franco-Spanish actress/model Astrid Berges-Frisbey. Won’t stop us setting up 'Pierre Perrier single' as a Google alert, though.

**Things we love about him: **At 5ft 9in he’s not the tallest guy, but he’s OK with that (probably).

His English isn’t great, but he’s working on it. 'My English is not quite perfect yet, I’ve been meeting with agents and managers across the world, but first things first, I’m going to speak better English!' Anyone else signing up to a TEFL course, sharpish?

He’s a big fan of British TV – Sherlock, Luther and Black Mirror all get the Perrier Seal Of Approval.

Follow Rebecca on Twitter @Rebecca_hol

This article originally appeared on The Debrief.

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