Here’s to the guy who’s finally said what we’ve all been thinking for a very long time now but were too afraid to say: HE’S DONE WITH THE KARDASHIANS.
The incident happened during a segment on Good Morning Orlando where a radio presenter came on to talk celeb news. After a story about Jennifer Aniston finished, the subject of the next story flashed up and, seeing it concerned a Kardashian, John, the main news anchor, lost it.
‘I’m having a good Friday so I refuse to talk about the Kardashians today,’ he explained as he walked off set. ‘I’ve had enough of the Kardashians. I can’t take it any more.’
As if by magic, he was instantly replaced by another smartly-suited news anchor (we’ll call him Replacement News Anchor Guy) who took John’s place on the couch next to fellow presenter Big Necklace And Hair Lady.
The radio presenter (Jenny) tried valiantly to go on explaining her story which was about Kylie-or-Kendall getting a new rabbit. ‘She got a beautiful grey bunny rabbit and she named it Bruce!’ she says.
‘I DON’T CARE!’ interrupts John from offstage. ‘THIS FAMILY! I’M SICK OF THIS FAMILY! I CAN’T TAKE IT ANY MORE. IT’S A NON STORY. WE TALK ABOUT THIS FAMILY EVERY FREAKING DAY ON THIS SHOW AND NOBODY CARES ABOUT THIS FAMILY ANY MORE. I’VE HAD ENOUGH IT’S FRIDAY I WANT TO HAVE A GOOD FRIDAY AND I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE KARDASHIANS.’
After taking a deep breath, he continues, ‘Don’t you guys listen to the research? No-one cares about them any more.’
‘Erm, that’s not true,’ pipes up Big Necklace And Hair Lady, who is clearly very irked about the whole thing. ‘They actually get very good ratings,’ she grumbles, thus informing the audience that her show exists not to inform and educate its watchers but rather to placate them.
‘His head looks like a tomato now,’ joins in Replacement News Anchor Guy in a bid to be crowned Most Unhelpful Replacement Ever.
‘NOBODY CARES ABOUT THEM!’ John yells, still offstage, meaning we can’t confirm the colour of his face.
‘I’m sorry Jenny, that you had to witness this,’ Big Necklace lady says with a voice of steel that means John’s definitely going to get it in the neck later.
Here’s to John. Thank you, John, for having the meltdown that we all want to have.
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.