The first time we met Liam Payne he was a cute floppy-haired kid from Wolverhampton with a big voice. All he really wanted in life was to win over the X-Factor judges. He had zero idea that they’d decide he wasn’t quite solo artist material and so would end up as a fifth of one of the biggest boy bands in the world. He was sweet, unassuming and eager to please. He reminded me of little boy Arthur from Disney’s animated The Sword in the Stone film. Look it up.
But then One Direction happened. Liam got kinda hot, a bit older and not necessarily a bit wiser. One Direction stopped happening, he hooked up with Cheryl, became a father and now seems to be having a bit of a cultural identity crisis.
Everyone’s a bit concerned, you see. He posted a picture to Instagram (as one does) of himself wearing a leopard print hoodie and red joggers with a picture of the Mona Lisa on the thigh (as one doesn’t) with his passport in one hand and the other giving the camera the middle finger.
The cringe doesn’t stop there. This picture which has since been deleted from Instagram (I’m hoping one of his handlers sat him down to have a bit of a chat about the dos and don’ts of life), was posted with the caption ‘You can only get jet lag from a jet the rest of yall have got plane lag #NOFUCKS’.
I really hoped that these were lyrics that he was misguidedly quoting to fulfil the hip-hop try-hard persona he’s dabbling in at the moment, but they’re not. I googled it. I think he was trying to be cool. I think he was trying to brag about money and his apparent ‘give a fuck’ superstar status. I think he’s a bit confused. I think Liam Payne definitely gives all the fucks. I think Liam Payne needs to come home now.
I think it’s time we had a little sit down, Liam, because you seem to have lost your way a bit. Once upon a time you were kind and cute. You came across as sincere, humble even. But now you’re coming across in a bit of an unflattering light, babes. And I think you know that - hence deleting your far from humble jet brag picture from Instagram.
Maybe it’s time to chill a bit. Maybe it’s time to jump on a commercial, economy class flight back to the UK and take the hour and 50 minute off-peak train up to Wolverhampton and spend some time with your mum. Bring your baby Bear along, we haven’t seem him on your Instagram for a while. That’d be nice, eh?
Don't be that guy we all know from high school. The one who was clean as a whistle, only got the Justin Bieber haircut because he felt left out when all his mates did and was dead against things like foul language, self absorption and smoking weed. The one who then got bit older, fancied a go at the sexy arrogance thing that seems to have worked so well for a couple of his other Insta-popular mates and got a bit carried away.
Go ahead and Strip It Down and all that. That was kinda cool. We know the words and we'll dance along with your other loyal fans. But let's leave the out of character profanities and financially fueled arrogance to the big boys out there desperately trying to hold on to relevance, shall we? You ain't quite there yet.
READ MORE: Take A Walk Down Memory Lane And Revisit All Of Zayn Malik's Hairstyles
ZAYN's hairstyles
1 of 232010
Back in 2010 when ZAYN appeared on The X Factor, the singer had classic black hair in a simple style.
2 of 232012
Two years later, ZAYN was still rocking his black hair but styled it into a quiff.
3 of 232012
A few weeks later ZAYN experimented for the first time with bleach and coloured one streak of his fringe blond.
4 of 232012
Later in 2012, ZAYN went even further with the blond bleach, leading to this epic look.
5 of 232013
In 2013 ZAYN rocked shorter black hair, accompanied with facial stubble.
6 of 232013
Later on in the year of 2013, ZAYN showed off a more grown up look with a thicker looking beard and dark locks.
7 of 232014
After letting his hair grow for the past year, ZAYN channeled his inner Justin Bieber with this hairstyle. Pictured here with his bandmate Louis Tomlinson.
8 of 232014
In the same month, ZAYN tidied up his longer locks and looked smart in November 2014.
9 of 232014
When One Direction attended the American Music Awards in December 2014, ZAYN showed off his brand new style.
10 of 232014
In the same month, ZAYN showed off yet another new hairstyle when he attended the NRJ Music Awards with this slicked back look.
11 of 232015
Pictured here with his mum, ZAYN changed his hairstyle dramatically in 2015 when he got a short buzz cut.
12 of 232015
Following on from his buzz cut, ZAYN decided to dye his short hair GREEN! ZAYN's ex-fiancé Perrie Edwards debuted the look on her Instagram page with this photo.
13 of 232015
It seems ZAYN wasn't a fan of his green hair as just a few weeks later he showed off his white blond buzz cut. Taking to Twitter ZAYN wrote, 'White hair'.
14 of 232015
With his hair growing slightly, ZAYN attended the Paris Fashion Week looking very handsome with his shorter looking hair.
15 of 232016
To celebrate the release of his debut solo track 'Pillowtalk' in 2016, ZAYN appeared in the music video rocking blond hair with his girlfriend Gigi Hadid.
16 of 232016
ZAYN debuted his bright pink quiff on Valentines Day in 2016. Aww!
17 of 232016
When the pink dye washed out, ZAYN was left with this light pink hair do.
18 of 232016
Come May and ZAYN had yet again shaved off his longer locks. The singer showed off his new cut when he appeared on the red carpet with Gigi at the Met Gala.
19 of 232016
By mid 2016, ZAYN's hair was slowly growing back, showing off this look on the red carpet.
20 of 232016
In September 2017, ZAYN appeared at New York Fashion Week showing off a look we've never seen before! With dark hair and thick dark beard, fans loved the new look.
21 of 232017
When 2017 landed, ZAYN showed off yet another new look! Gone was his dark beard, the singer instead opted for a clean shaven look with medium length hair.
22 of 232017
ZAYN returned to the blond side later in 2017 when he showed off a brand new bleach blond buzz cut.
23 of 232017
ZAYN's latest look totally shocked fans! The 'Dusk Till Dawn' singer shaved off ALL of his hair in August and later admitted he had to as the bleach had ruined it.
Follow Jazmin on Instagram @JazKopotsha
This article originally appeared on The Debrief.