In 2019, being a celebrity is less about having a pout that could cause a black eye, more about growing a business empire to rival a Roman war lord's. The Kardashian just grew another branch to it's own sponcon-dynasty as Kourtney Kardashian launched her new lifestyle blog Poosh (also the name of her six-year-old daughter Penelope - in case you were wondering).
According to Kourtney, she launched Poosh because 'I felt there was something missing in the healthy lifestyle space.' going on to explain 'people are constantly asking me how I do it all, from being a single mom to working full-time to still maintaining a social life. I get endless questions about food, kids, beauty, and fashion...'
But hang on a second - aren't we getting Deja Vu? Because before Poosh, before the explosion of lifestyle blogs. there was already a one-stop destination for all of your (sometimes a little 'alternative') expensive celebrity solutions to life. We are, of course, talking about GOOP. Perhaps not all celebrity-branded blogs are created equal, but we were betting that we were going to see some GOOP-inspired solutions when Poosh launched last week, and we weren't disappointed. Here are some of the best GOOP moments on Poosh...
All Of The Most Goop-esque Things On Poosh - Grazia
When Gwyneth extolled the virtues of a Gluten-Free diet in the fledgling GOOP days it was widely ridiculed. But now a gluten-free lifestyle is leading the charges of the wellness trend along with veganism and flexitarianism (the vagina-steaming never really took on in the same way), while we're not quite sure how we feel about green pancakes - if there's anything GOOP taught us it's not to dismiss the power of a food fad. Plus they actually look quite good...
'Why not drink your morning coffee and go for a little stroll down the road or in a park, taking a moment to think about what you can see, smell, and taste? That daily connection to nature will help you feel more mindful and, at the same time, you will benefit from some extra vitamin D.' - yes, this snippet of advice does have a tinge of Pippatips about it - but GOOP incontestably rules the mindfulness roost (Gwyneth, obviously has been on it for ages - from mindful parenting to how to mindfully disconnect from technology). In the same article, entitled 'Daily Habits To Lead A More Mindful Life' Poosh also encourages a 'gratitude diary' and a 'happiness workout'. Gratitude diaries I could get on board with - but in London, it has to be said that maybe we're ever-so-slightly less convinced about the breathing in the sights, smells and tastes.
In the same style as the 'if a tree falls in a wood question' - if an 'essential' home product doesn't cost upwards of $400, is it even on GOOP? Poosh appears to have taken note - and swears by 'updating you bedroom' with organic bedding 'Follow Kourt's lead and swap your bedding for organic brands that are free of chemicals.' If you'd like to truly sleep like Kourtney though you'll have to go for a Legna-branded duvet set - as the site states: 'Kourt uses Legna on all beds in her home.' ($97 for a pillowcase anyone?).
Ok - it might not quite be inserting jade eggs into your vagina a-la-Gwyneth. Kourtney's (slightly more PG) tips for maintaining your womanly parts include regular boob exercises of chest flies and push ups (all in the name of 'how to defeat gravity').
Something we didn't realise existed until Poosh enlightened us? Organic no-applicator tampons. Kourtney's preferred brand are Naturacare which retail at a more-budget-friendly-than-expected £8.69 for a box of 20. Unsurprisingly planet-friendly tampons are something GOOP hopped on way before the Kardashians. Gwyneth favours She - a brand of nontoxic and biodegradable tampons which also happen to be Instagram-friendly (erm - just what we needed?). On the website she enthuses 'But we have to admit that we first tried these because we were utterly dazzled by the visuals. The palm-frond-printed box is so pretty, we feel not just comfortable adding it to the bathroom-shelf landscape/décor but thrilled.'
Taking a lukewarm bottle of Cloudy Bay to a dinner party, according to Poosh is not the done thing. Helpfully though, Kourtney has some alternative suggestions: 'Rather than opting for a traditional hostess gift, shop outside the box and go the extra mile with something a bit more thoughtful.' she enthuses 'Another unique idea is an interactive gift like these sleek (and stylish) Louis Vuitton playing cards' (a snip for $485). GOOP choices are, of course, similarly eclectic: next time why not ditch the wine and go with $72 floral scissors (on another note - what are these?) or a wellness oil kit. Just what every dinner party needs?