'I nearly killed myself, but I survived it,’ Katie Price says over Zoom, while discussing her upcoming Channel 4 documentary Katie Price: Trauma and Me, which explores her mental health, recent PTSD diagnosis, and what drove her to breaking point.
The one-off documentary picks up after the star's horror drink-drive car crash last year, with the opening scenes showing the star getting ready for court. 'I think the car crash if I'm honest, that's just a small thing out of everything that's happened over the years,' she revealed.
‘The crash was just proof to me that when my trigger was set off - I didn't know how to handle it. That was a prime example of me spiralling out of control because I needed help. She goes on to explain why she got into the car. ‘I wanted to drive to my friend's house to talk, because I had an ex-husband, who told my daughter that he won’t let me see her anymore. What can I do? My kids are my life'
She continued, 'So, I did have a drink,' she admits. 'I was on my own and I didn't know how to cope. I went to drive to my friend's house down the road and then obviously the crash happened. After that I thought enough, I've got to sort this out. I've got to learn to deal with everything.'
Katie continues, 'I'm lucky I didn't kill myself. I'm lucky I didn't kill anyone else - the crash was a wakeup call.' The reality star did avoid jail time for the crash but was handed a 16-week suspended prison sentence as well as a two-year driving ban.
She stresses that her major mental health triggers in life are her ex-husbands, managers, and the media. 'There are no greater triggers for me out there, but I've now learned to deal with not reacting to them. Now when there's a false media story, I've now learned not to react to that because I know who's behind it all.’
Katie explains that her breaking point came from a build up of negative experiences over the years. 'I've had more than a rough couple of years,' she said. ‘I’ve realised a lot of people over the years have been so obsessed with me.' She thinks when those relationships have broken down, people have become even more obsessed.
She says that her kids have seen the reality of her struggles. 'My kids know everything. Obviously, the younger kids don't understand. But certainly, Princess and Junior. They understand mental health and they saved me from taking my own life.'
Katie says, 'I nearly killed myself, but I survived it. Well done, everyone - you got me where you wanted me! But now I've got the strength to come up. I have my therapy every two weeks. I'm proud that I've been in the priory. I'm proud that I've turned my life around. No one will ever get to me like that again.'
What does Katie want viewers to take away from this documentary? 'I hope people will see how much I've been hurt, I've been damaged and I've been misunderstood,' she admits. 'Hopefully it will make people think about whether it’s worth trying to destroy a person. I would like people to question what are we actually gaining out of this? I'm just human being who loves my kids and my job. I don't feel like I need to prove anything to anyone anymore.'
Katie Price: Trauma & Me airs on Thursday 8 September at 9pm on Channel 4 and All 4