And so it's farewell to Jackie Stallone, who has passed away at the grand age of 98. The astrologer was known internationally more for her famous offspring - Rocky actor Sylvester Stallone - than her ability to read celestial bodies. But in this country she will go down in history as one of the greatest celebrity reality television participants of all time.
In 2005, the UK's Celebrity Big Brother kicked off its third series with a typical motley crew of actors, models and broadcasters. It was a genuinely interesting mix. Caprice. Germaine Greer. John McCririck. Blazing Squad's Kenzey. Brigitte Nielsen. Viewers may have wondered who the latter was. She had found middling international success but was not an obvious choice for a British reality show. She may herself have been surprised to have been approached with the invitation and accompanying fee. But it all became clear on Day 5.
The housemates were lined up in medieval regalia to welcome a surprise new housemate. Nobody knew who might enter. And then in came an octogenarian female, with ruby red hair and lips to match, viewing the men and women before her as a cat views a parade of mice. If she was hoping for shock, she was correct. In all honesty, nobody seemed to know who she was. Nobody but one.
'Oh my god, Jackie!?' shouted Brigitte. Yes, Brigitte had been deceived, brought into the house under the assumption that her public profile and personality warranted her presence. In fact, it was a slightly cruel trick. She had been lured into a prison populated by strangers and her former mother-in-law. Jackie purred.
'Yeah. Jackie.'
Nonchalant and demurring, it came with the hint of a shrug and a shiver of a 'Br'. 'Yeah, Brackie.'. As if to say, 'who else did you think it was going to be? I am a celebrity, and this is Celebrity Big Brother.'
In fact, Jackie later claimed to have felt tricked. She had anticipated a different calibre of VIP. She assumed she would walk in to find Madonna, or Elton John. She wanted a mansion and chandeliers. As an American, she had not witnessed previous series, whose highlights included Anthea Turner or Mark Owen.
Nevertheless, she created the necessary drama. Despite her effusive welcome, Brigitte was devastated. It was a cruel shock that Germaine likened to schoolyard bullying. She infuriated others with her laziness, her diva-like demands, her inability to open a bottle of wine or make a cup of tea. She said she had staff to do all that. It is no surprise that she was gone by Day 9, evicted by the public. But she should have been kept in, simply so that she could have continued to recline like Cleopatra in a bath of milk, dispatching insults and criticisms at those around her. It would have been television gold.
Instead, we had four days of reality TV perfection. It is a shame that she did not use this as a springboard to something greater. Perhaps she had her taste and did not like it. But she was perfect.
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