So, Kylie’s latest makeup line, Birthday, dropped yesterday – fittingly, just in time for her 22nd. Before the launch, she and sister Khloe posted a video to YouTube on Kylie’s channel: in the grand tradition of ‘drunk get ready with me’ beauty vlogs, Kylie and Khloe’s adventures span more than twenty minutes and provide plenty of opportunity to showcase the new products as well as some good old-fashioned Drunk Time. The video caption describes the experience as ‘definitely the most fun I’ve ever had making a video!’ – well, we had a lot of fun watching it. Here are our highlights: you can watch the full film in all its glory here.
When Khloe ‘can’t work under these conditions’
As the shenanigans are ramping up, Kylie’s waiting for Khloe and facetimes her to check on her progress. Assured that her sister’s en route, Kylie’s having as much fun as only a 22-year-old billionaire can – when Khloe notes ‘You have like, a full face of makeup on’. Uh oh. Kylie responds that she’s about to take it off, but that’s not good enough: Khloe ‘can’t work under these conditions.’ Oh wait, she can! We’re back in business!
When they introduce themselves (like their names might be news to anyone watching)
‘Hi, I’m Kylie.’
‘I’m Khloe, Kylie’s sister.’
Chyah. Every self-respecting YouTuber knows you open a video with your name, even if we don’t know why. It’s like signing off an email – as though your colleague’s forgotten who you are since you last spoke twenty minutes ago – or the way old people put their name at the end of text messages like you haven’t saved your auntie’s number. The girls are getting into their vlogger personas, ok? Ok
When Malika isn’t coming.
I didn’t know who Malika Haqq (Khloe’s BFF) was until I was Today Years Old. What I do know is that Malika, the subject of K&K’s first phone call in a string of many, does not want to come join the fun – first, she forgets where their office is (‘CALABASAS!!!’), then she gleefully reminds them she’s gotten rid of her car. Kylie offers to send an uber (twice). The phone call is over.
When Kris Jenner calls them ‘drunky monkeys’
Momager Kris Jenner is Khloe and Kylie's next phone call. Like Malika, she’s not coming to join the fun – but she does coin a phrase I’ll gladly take home in my pocket. ‘You guys are drunky monkeys but I love it’, says Kris – 'drunky monkeys' is lovely. Gently chastising, funny, apt, and it rhymes. Yes please.
When Corey Gamble just kind of leaves?
Poor Corey is the video’s first live guest. Largely, he sits behind Khloe and Kylie: silent, occasionally smiling tactfully. He makes a valiant effort to get on their tequila level, but does briefly up and leave when the squealing reaches its crescendo. Don’t worry, he’s back in the next cut.
When Sofia Richie is thrilled
Sofia Richie is just there, around ¾ of the way through the video. We don’t see her arrive, but she joins Corey in the Silent Background Seats from about minute 16. Soon, Kylie leaps to kindly apply very pink eye shadow for her — an interlude Sofia takes with good grace but not much enthusiasm.
… and when Khloe keeps calling Kylie a billionaire 😬 😬 😬
Oh god, so many times. No fewer than five references, sprinkled through the 20 minute marathon, are made by Khloe to her little sister’s billioniarehood (it’s a word, don’t @ me). Kylie lets each one slide. Make of it what you will.
