Last night, we went to Miley Cyrus's first stop on the European leg of her Bangerz tour (she was meant to do some other venues first, but got ill, then ended up in hospital fighting an allergic reaction to antibiotics) – and it was well and truly amazing.
Here are eight things we learned from the gig at London's O2:
1. Miley is the ultimate performer
Say what you will about her behaviour, her attitude, her state of undress or her (frequent) swearing, Miley Cyrus can sing, rap, dance and work a crowd. Smacking her bum for the fans, humping a car, twerking and thanking individual fans for throwing badges of her recently dead dog Floyd at her, she knew how to get the cheering crowd even more hyped.
2. We want to be spat on
Even by someone overcoming a sinus infection. Miley glugged water, before spraying it on one side of the stage. Despite a couple of 'ew's, the other side of the stage were practically begging to be anointed with Miley's spittle-infused water. Then again, it was very warm in the O2 and it could have cooled down eager concert-goers. People might complain about what Miley and her fans do or don't wear but, bear in mind, it gets pretty warm with all of that dancing.
3. We wish we'd had someone like her growing up
Seriously. We spent our early mid-teens slouching around Slipknot gigs and Reading Festival in filthy hoods and baggy trousers. If we'd had a pop star who was controversial, but – here's the most shocking part of all – actually meant to be consumed by young women, we would have ended up in a warm, giggly party atmosphere that's actually girl-friendly instead of being pummelled around moshpits by unwashed men in their thirties.
4. She really likes gay people
During Adore You, instead of kissing someone in the crowd like she used to – she later admitted that she didn't want to get another 'nasty cold' from a fan and after her illness 'it's probably a good lesson for me to stop licking everything', Miley got members of the crowd to kiss each other. The footage from a roving camera was projected onto that giant screen, framed by a picture of a massive engagement ring, and Miley commanded people to make out with whoever was next to them, adding, 'We like it when girls make out with girls, and guys make out with guys.' We saw all sorts of combinations of couples kissing and, though some were a bit tongue-heavy, it was really cute. She later thanked the 'brave two men' who started the kissing and told us it's important to just be yourself.
5. There are ways of wooing an internet-obsessed generation of fans
Huge spectacular cartoons on a gigantic screen, impossibly large sets (think, a 60ft statue of her late dog, Floyd, and a bed you could starfish across ten times), dancing everything – from mustard bottles to lighters to people in giant bobble heads – there were plenty of really weird gimmicks to keep the crowd occupied. The only bit which made us question the sanity of today's youth was when, despite Miley being at the back of the arena, doing her acoustic set, the majority of people at the ground level looked in the opposite way, facing towards the big screen so they could watch live footage of her instead of simply gazing at her in real life.
6. Miley's cover of Lana Del Rey's Summertime Sadness is wonderful
As is her cover of (her godmother) Dolly Parton's Jolene, the rctic Monkeys' Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High and Bob Dylan's You're Gonna Make Me Lonesome When You Go. By the way, she's a proper great country singer.
7. If Miley's having a breakdown, or has had a breakdown, we would quite like a breakdown
Seriously. She looks great, she works great, everything seems to be ticking over for her following this recovery – which, just FYI, was assisted by Chinese medicine after 'some bitch nurse tried to fucking kill me' with antibiotics.
8. You can have epiphanies while watching a former teen star give herself a front wedgie with an outfit made out of banknotes
The epiphany being that Miley Cyrus is well and truly amazing.
Follow Sophie on Twitter @sophwilkinson
Picture: Getty
This article originally appeared on The Debrief.