Caroline Flack's family have released an unpublished Instagram post she wrote days before she died. In it, the presenter writes that her ‘future had been swept from under my feet’ after she was arrested for allegedly assaulting her boyfriend.
Caroline’s mother, Chris, shared the caption with the Eastern Daily Press, saying it was important that her voice was heard, after Caroline was originally advised not to post it. ‘Carrie sent me this message at the end of January but was told not to post it by advisers but she so wanted to have her little voice heard,’ she told the Norfolk paper. ‘So many untruths were out there but this is how she felt and my family and I would like people to read her own words. Carrie was surrounded by love and friends but this was just too much for her.’
The caption by Caroline, who took her own life last Friday, starts, ‘For a lot of people, being arrested for common assault is an extreme way to have some sort of spiritual awakening but for me it's become the normal. I've been pressing the snooze button on many stresses in my life - for my whole life. I've accepted shame and toxic opinions on my life for over 10 years and yet told myself it's all part of my job. No complaining.
‘The problem with brushing things under the carpet is .... they are still there and one day someone is going to lift that carpet up and all you are going to feel is shame and embarrassment.
‘On December the 12th 2019 I was arrested for common assault on my boyfriend… Within 24 hours my whole world and future was swept from under my feet and all the walls that I had taken so long to build around me, collapsed. I am suddenly on a different kind of stage and everyone is watching it happen. I have always taken responsibility for what happened that night. Even on the night. But the truth is ... It was an accident.’
She added, ‘I’m so sorry to my family for what I have brought upon them and for what my friends have had to go through. "I’m not thinking about ‘how I’m going to get my career back.” I’m thinking about how I’m going to get mine and my family’s life back.’
In the UK and Ireland, Samaritans can be contacted on 116 123 or email jo@samaritans.org or jo@samaritans.ie.