They call it a workout for your face. They say it’s a boot camp for your creases, cardio for your extra chins and a way to strengthen and sharpen your cheekbones. Intrigued by this no-sweat HIIT session, I found myself lying supine on a massage table in a backroom of Selfridges about to experience the most hyped deep sculpting, face-whipping facial on the internet.
Facegym calls it their ‘Signature’ treatment, it lasts 45 minutes and is unlike anything I’ve ever come across. There’s no spa music clinking away in the background and there’s no aroma of potpourri and incense wafting around the room. Instead, it’s just me and my therapist armed with a few lethal-looking tools under the bright lights.
What Does The Treatment Promise?
It’s described as a warm up for your face as it uses muscle strengthening techniques to tone your skin and energise it. It lasts 30 minutes and includes a lot of smacking and deep tissue massaging with various pummelling tools.
How Does It Work?
First I was stripped naked, by which I mean my make-up was taken off. Then something called a ‘face ball’ was rolled over my head and shoulders – it was weighty, but not unpleasant. A branded aromatic oil was then rubbed into the skin for blood stimulation and to simulate the muscles before my face was pounded.
For the next five minutes, I was slapped, tickled, pressed, whacked and pinched until my face started spasming. It was as pleasant as it sounds. Then came Facegym’s Pro wand, which is a multi-head electronic muscle stimulator. While it may look like a massage tool/vibrator, it’s actually a diamond facetted torture instrument. It conducts microwaves across the skin that feel like pins and needles and make you involuntary twitch. I felt like I’d lost control of my face as my lips were moving on their own accord and my eye was winking inappropriately. Supposedly this helps drain the lymph nodes and will give me smoother skin. After this attack on the senses, my skin was rubbed with a cooling cream, and the treatment was finished.
Does It Deliver?
The cynic in me hates to say this, but yes. My cheekbones were noticeably higher and sharper after the treatment, and my double chin was seemingly slapped away. But, sadly it didn’t last long. After a couple of night’s sleep (and a few drinks down the pub) my face dropped back to normal and my muscles seemed to relax back to their resolutely droopy position. As I’m 27 and my skin hasn’t felt the full force of ageing (yet) this sort of treatment only has slight nuanced effects. That said, it was still effective on my (relatively) youthful skin.
Will You Do It Again?
If I had a big event and I knew I was going to be photographed, I’d definitely consider it as my face was more sculpted from the treatment, but if I’m honest it’s unlikely. For me, £45 is quite a lot, and I expect to see lasting effects. Maybe an investment in their Pro tool would make more sense as I could recreate the effects at home, but that will have to wait until payday as one of those bad boys costs a mighty £399.
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.